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The Unorganized Township of Bootstuck
The Unorganized Township of Bootstuck is a documentary-style audio descent into a place that shouldn't exist—but very much insists that it does.
Once a forgotten military outpost in the depths of Northern Ontario, Bootstuck has taken on a life of its own. Discovered only through a pile of mislabeled cassette tapes at a Sudbury garage sale, the story of Bootstuck slowly unravels through scattered interviews, cryptic clues, and increasingly bizarre residents. The deeper you listen, the more you realize — this isn't just a town. It's a puzzle. And somewhere in that puzzle?
A plane crash that changed everything.
Somewhere between folklore, found audio, and fever dream, Bootstuck blurs the line between documentary and delusion—offering listeners a place to get lost in, over and over again.
The Unorganized Township of Bootstuck
TAPE 40 - Pastels, Pontiacs, and Psychiatrists
Tape 40 opens with an image that’s equal parts slapstick and unsettling: Caleb, attempting what he calls “skywalking,” ties his shoelaces around his hands until he can’t breathe, only to be spun around, slapped on the backside, and sent rolling down a hill like a roly-poly bug. Inexplicably, Hat Guy leaves the room mid sentence to holler a bunch of cattle off the front lawn. From there, the conversation shifts to springtime, a subject taken with Bootstuck’s usual logic: last year it meant Caleb strapping springs to his shoes; this year it will mean scattering springs across the forest floor so that no matter where you step, “it’s always spring.”
The discussion meanders through maroon Pontiacs, pastel colors, and the persistent complaint that everyone in Bootstuck interrupts each other. Dave drifts in with thoughts on gas mileage, while a failed attempt to spell “psychiatrist” leads to the revelation that Bootstuck has no doctors for the mind—only one who deals with ingrown toenails. Mental health, it seems, is handled socially: if someone feels blue, Steven paints them red until they’re a different color and “all’s good.”
The tape ends with a plan for a “fashion show at lunch,” a recurring event that involves burlap sacks and questionable creativity. While most will opt for the simple hole-in-the-top approach, Dave apparently intends to fashion burlap chaps—an idea received with the confused question: “You can see your bones?”
Tape 40 is as fractured as it is vivid: a portrait of a town where footwear physics, psychiatry, and lunchtime couture share equal importance, and where coherence is always just out of reach.
www.bootstuck.com
I'm sorry, but we're going to have to go now. Caleb came up to me with shoes in his hand about three moons ago. I was thinking he was going to go do skywalking again. What he done did is tie his laces up on his hands so tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, that you couldn't even see where he was breathing. So what we did is we turned him around and slapped him on his bottom and sent him walking down his hands down the hill. Now, he didn't get too far. Well, he did, but not walking. He started rolling like a roly-poly-oly, and there he goes. You know them bugs? You know them bugs? They got a little, uh, like, uh... Since I've started calling you on a regular basis, I've also started taking Xanax. Oh, that's nice. I had a van once too. Oh, God. That's okay. Most things around here aren't important. We take our time with the important things, and then we just go ahead and leave the other stuff alone. Okay. I have been asked to inquire about springtime. Our springtime is coming shortly. Oh, yeah. Springtime. Round the corner. Yep. That's okay. I'll let you answer in a minute. Last spring was Caleb's first spring, and he put springs on his shoes. I see. He had it all wrong. No, different story. Now we're just going to put springs all over the ground in the forest. So it doesn't really matter where you start. It's always going to be spring. But we'll wait till April. What do you do for spring? What do I do for spring? Yeah. I'll let you answer in a minute. I put on a raincoat. We change our... That's lighter. Maroon is dark. Think about a maroon color for a minute. Hang on, I'm speaking. Think about a maroon color for a minute. Like in an old Pontiac. And then think about how it would be nicer if it were pastel. Go ahead. Another question people wanted to know. Yep, I'll let them know. Yeah, is why people at Bootstuck interrupt your questions all the time. Well, who said that? Every listener we have. Listeners? You're listening to me and I'm listening to you. And sometimes Dave listens on the other end. Looking for good gas mileage? Put the phone down. No Chevys. Oh, God. And no El Camino either. So, no Chevy dealer right now. He's not putting it down, but he's listening in. I like to put things down, mostly when they're hot. I'm curious. I have a question of my own. Do you have psychiatrists up there? Yeah, we do. We do. Most of us. Most of you? Yeah. What's a psychiatrist? Oh, God. We've got a big board of big words. Can you spell it for me? P-I-S-I-F-I... Good enough. All right. Think about it. Cross it off. I'm going to use it in a minute. Supply a treat. Okay. Your turn. A psychiatrist is a doctor that specializes in dealing with problems that occur within one's mind. Oh, yeah. We have a doctor that deals with problems. Like if you have a toe and a nail is sticking on the side, we have a guy to do that. That would be a foot doctor. You don't have anybody up there that specializes in dealing with your mind. We talk a lot around here. Like, I'm feeling a little blue today. And then Steven would come over and say, that's all right. and paint me red. And then it turns me a different color and all's good. I like pastels. Pastels. That's lighter. Maroon is dark. You ever have a fashion show up there? Oh yeah, every time at lunch. Fashion show, fashion show, fashion show at lunch.
Unknown:Woo!
Speaker 00:Yep, we do it. Everybody, tomorrow we're going to actually do another one. We weren't going to, but now we should because you talked about it. Yep, it's not advised to do a fashion show, fashion show, fashion show at lunch in the wintertime outside. Everyone's going to get a burlap sack, and then you've got to race to make a fashion from it. I'm going to go with the conventional, cut a hole in the top and just put it over your head. I know Dave will probably do something like chaps. Chaps? Chaps. You know them? You can see your bones?
Unknown:No.
